How We’ve Coped with a Food Allergy

Let’s talk food allergies.

First off, I want to express my complete and utter contempt at the fact that eating a regular, run of the mill food item could potentially kill a human being.

I mean, we’re not talking about suspect berries found in a forest, here. We’re talking kids denied the joy of eating peanut butter sandwiches for lunch and adults unable to enjoy a healthy piece of salmon for dinner. The top nine food allergens or a derivative of them can be found in most foods in your local grocery store or restaurant. Not a problem for those with no allergies to food. But for those who have one or more food allergies, it gets dicey. Sure, labeling is a thing, admittedly improving over the years as these allergies become more prevalent and companies become more educated and conscious. But tasks as simple as putting together meals or ordering dinner out can still prove to be complicated.

Currently, around thirty-two million people in the US are affected by food allergies; one out of thirteen of them are children under eighteen. From what I’ve seen, there is no singular reason as to why food allergies have risen so sharply over the past few decades. Between 1997 and 2011 alone, there was a fifty percent increase in pediatric allergies. Research indicates that anything from our homes and personal hygiene becoming “too clean” over time (the hygiene hypothesis), to delaying the introduction of high allergen potential foods in young children, to the weakening of the human immune system due to industrialization and even a lack of Vitamin D could be culprits in the rise of food allergies. As current statistics suggest, a fair amount of today’s food allergic children have no family history. As a matter of fact, two out of three food allergic children do not have food allergic parents. Case in point: my peanut allergic daughter.

There are no peanut allergies on my side or husband’s side of the family and really only a few minor food allergies in general; and yet, lo and behold, our child is allergic to the most troublesome of the top nine.

In our case, all the precursors of having a food allergy were there for my child from infancy, including eczema and other sensitivities. We made our suspicions known to the pediatrician and thankfully found out definitively by the time she was two, allowing us to have successfully navigated the allergy waters for years now. It’s been annoying, sure, and there have been moments of frustration from both kid and parent alike. I mean, it’s one thing to monitor what you yourself are buying for your child, but it’s another thing to have to monitor what someone else is providing them. Daycare and school can be stressful enough when it comes to potential exposure but add in well-meaning family members, church members and other parents with non-allergy kids and the effort quickly grows tiresome. Constantly reminding family and friends to read labels before offering food, denying your kid candy from a fellow member of the church congregation, and asking the parent of a birthday kid what type of snacks and cake will be served at the party is wearing. Telling your child that they can’t have what everyone else is having is an important lesson, sure, but it also stinks. Being the kid that has their own separate dessert at a party is lame. Necessary at times, but lame none the less.

The thought of events, trips, or vacations causes anxiety because who knows how the food is prepared and if cross contamination with allergens could occur. Calls to restaurants without allergen menus lead to escalation to (hopefully) higher level staff until a satisfactory answer is obtained or you give up and go to the next option.

It’s a chore. But some of us have been chosen to walk this path with our loved ones and we tough through it. No matter the cause, my kid has this allergy, and we do what we need to do.

Thankfully, children nowadays can be very accepting of other children and their idiosyncrasies. During my child’s time in school, her friends have been cautious and mindful of her allergy to peanuts, reminding their parents not to send them to school with peanut butter sandwiches because they sit next to her at the lunch table (even though her allergy is not airborne or contact). Most parents have been supportive and quick to offer peanut free options at parties and gatherings. School is not peanut or other allergen free, but allergy info is provided for menu selections, and a note was placed on her lunch account so that when checking out at the lunch line she would be advised on anything on her tray that could be a problem. The school nurse is engaged, proactive and stringent about children not sharing lunches or snacks. She even personally acknowledges each year that we get through without having to epi. All this, coupled with the fact that my child is careful and takes her allergy seriously, helps me to feel as secure as I can possibly can that she is safe for seven hours a day.

I’ve learned a lot along this journey. For instance, I’ve learned that doctors and specialists may not ascribe to the same metrics or statistics on the same topic. As in one specialist says that based on the test results, my kid is probably not in the ten percent of children who outgrow their peanut allergy and the other says even with higher numbers it is still possible for her to fall into the thirty percent of children who outgrow their allergy. That’s a twenty percent difference. Has the data changed? Are some sources preferred over others? Or is the data just ever-changing? Honestly, despite what her numbers look like now, I’m holding onto hope that she will outgrow it.

I’ve also learned that though I would not have chosen this walk for her, having a peanut allergy has instilled in my child a sense of responsibility that she may not otherwise have developed so early on. I’ve found that I have no problem speaking up and advocating for my child. And I’ll continue to do so no matter what.

Food allergies be damned.